Life...

 

 

 

 

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My keyboard looks so nice now.  I've discovered that slightly wet q-tips combat the West African dust wonderfully.

 

I was planning to post yesterday evening.  But babysitting a baby who was likely teething = no blog post.  It's okay, though.  I like babies better than blogs. :)

 

Oh, and that newsletter?  It ain't gonna get written this week, folks.

 

 

It's hot today.  84° with 74% humidity as of right now.

I'm really hating hot season…and it's barely started.  Power cuts are more frequent this time of year, and there have also been water shortages.  At this point, I still have water, for which I'm definitely thankful.

 

And on a somewhat-related note, rehydration drink is less-than-tasty.  Now before you start thinking that "drinking a rehydration drink" somehow means I'm sick and puking and need to be on an IV…let me reassure you that I'm not sick or puking.  It's just because it's hot here.  Therefore one sweats a lot.  And if one sweats a lot, one loses both water and a proper balance of electrolytes.

 

But as un-fun as being sweaty is, it's way less gross than puking.

 

I'm glad we had this talk. <nods to The Pioneer Woman>

 

Annnyway…

 

 

One of my favorite quotes from last week was when I was in a taxi and we drove through the market.  The taxi driver was like, "Ew...it smells really bad."  I just wanted to laugh because I always think the same thing when I go past, but I figured maybe if you've lived here all your life, your nose is used to certain smells.  Apparently not always. :)

 

 

Tuesday I was over Angèle's.  The TV was on and first it was some Nigerian film with some people trying to cast out a demon and then it was a Senegalese film with some spiritual elements that I couldn't really follow that well (because it was in Wolof and not French).  Honestly sometimes it's all overwhelming to me.  I know the spiritual darkness here is very real and very strong, and it's hard to know how to process it all.  (When it's on TV there's the added question of what's realistic vs. what's over-dramatized to make an interesting story.)  It was rather a relief when they switched the channel to the soccer match.

 

 

Wednesday I got to talk with Michelle, which I always look forward to.  She's pretty awesome. :) When I got off Skype, I felt like crying 'cause I miss her and I miss home...  I used to do that every time I got off the phone with Mom, but that hasn't happened in a while.  It's not that I'm less homesick necessarily, it just looks different now.

 

 

One of my friends wrote this on her blog recently -

 

A proud heart is not a wise heart.
A strong willed heart is not a wise heart.
A fearful heart is not a wise heart.
An anxious heart is not a wise heart.
A forgetful heart is not a wise heart.
An unforgiving heart is not a wise heart.
A weak willed heart is not a wise heart.
A materialistic heart is not a wise heart.
A stubborn heart is not a wise heart.
An angry heart is not a wise heart.
A cold heart is not a wise heart.
A comparing heart is not a wise heart.
A boxed heart is not a wise heart.

 

That last one especially struck me.  Time and time again I've been guilty of try to fit God in a box - a box that isn't usually much bigger than me.

 

The thing is, it's not like my unbelief actually ties His hands.  He's bigger than that.  It's more that unbelief ties a blindfold around my eyes and keeps me from really getting to see what He's doing.

 

Lord, help my unbelief...

 

Unbelief that says what people think of me is more important that what You think.

Unbelief that says I shouldn't disappoint others.

Unbelief that leads me to worry and fret about that situation every time it pops into my mind.

Unbelief that ultimately says, "God, I just don't trust that You're big enough to handle this."

 

Still, He is God.  Whether or not I always rest fully in that, He. is. still. God.

 

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Some links -

Planned Neglect (on saying no/disappointing people).  I happened to read this on a day when I was feeling particularly discouraged about...disappointing people.  Cool how God knew what I needed, isn't it.

Testing, Testing, Testing  (the post I quoted from above)

Help Me Find It  I discovered this song today.  Part of me wants to launch into a spiel about how we need to be more concerned about seeking God than about "seeking His will", but that aside, it's a good song.