It was one of those days where my brain was overflowing.
"Consider doing this," she wrote.
I opened the link and thought, "What?! Maybe she's just trying to be helpful, but how can she possibly think I have enough time for this?" For a moment, I stopped to think through some of the ramifications and felt a twinge of panic. In that flustered spirit, I clicked out a response to the effect that it was ridiculous, impractical, I didn't have time, and why would I try it anyway?
"I didn't say you should consider it." Yes, you did!!!
I scrolled down to re-read the exchange.
"Considering doing this." THAT's what she had said. Changes everything, doesn't it? I felt both foolish and - dare I admit? - relieved.
I've learned that when I'm feeling stressed, my reactions tend to show me what my heart is really like. Impatient. Worried. Overwhelmed. Caught up in my own little world of busy. ...Or whatever else it may be.
The way I responded to a simple email (panic and frustration) showed me that I wasn't trusting the Lord and, consequently, was feeling overwhelmed.
Stress can (and usually does!) lower our self-control. Is it an excuse for sin? No. But those less-self-controlled reactions can serve as a reminder to slow down, take a deep breath, say a prayer. To take a peek inside our hearts and to ask Jesus to shine His light in there. When we recognize the sin (or non-sinful "weights" - Hebrews 12:1), then we can give it Him and keep growing.
He wants to show us our hearts...and sometimes He might even use a misread email to do so!
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