Saturday, March 5, 2011

Still too small

The days slip by.  You hear no news of the dying woman.  You have no idea if she's even still alive.  Every time you close your eyes, the scene haunts you - you see her still form being carried away from the village.  Spurred on by the urgency of the task, you throw yourself into studying with renewed passion.  But it just seems like you can't work fast enough.  You are conscious that the lives around you are fleeting, and you have no idea how many will slip into eternity without ever hearing of the God who loves them.  God, you plead, help me understand these people so I can communicate with them effectively. I feel like I'm facing an impossible task.
Sometimes it's just too much, and you foolishly wish that you could be back in the comfort of your home in America.  It breaks your heart to watch people around you dying without hope for eternity.  But that's why you've come.  That's why you're here.  You can't turn back.  You know you're too small.  But God's love for you is too big.  His love for these people is too big.

And you realize that you were never meant to be strong or great - that was always God's place.  Overwhelmed with gratitude, you praise Him for being what you cannot be.  God is still God, and you are not.

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